the thursday buzz: a friendly reminder on your vacation time

hi lil bees!! welcome back to the thursday buzz 🐝 

for those of you who are new here, the thursday buzz offer a peek behind the curtain — the inspiration for my Tuesday piece, from small actions I take in my own life, my latest reads & podcasts, or my raw stream of consciousness.

If you want a refresher for this past Tuesday’s piece around how scarcity mindset manifests in forms we aren’t even aware of:

Today, I wanted to share a few things that have helped me view life with abundance but in a digestible way.

1. Give, just start

2. Understand what wealth means to you, not others

3. Ask yourself what are your non-negotiables

4. Think about how you feel when you have money, and more importantly, when you don’t have money

5. Find things in real life that are abundant

6. Waste a little bit of time and resources?!

7. Surround yourself with people who think abundantly

1: Give, just start

Giving can mean so many things and IMHO, start small! You can start by giving $X to a charity you think does meaningful work. If you can’t afford it or struggle with donating, you can volunteer 30 minutes a week. Or if you love baking, make an extra batch of cookies to share with your friends. For me, it started with sharing / gifting my loved ones with books. Relinquishing that control slowly yet steadily is so fkin liberating, spoken as a fellow leo ♌️ 

2: Understand what wealth means to you, not others

Most people think money = logic, rationality, numbers. Yes, money is an object, but we attach value to a currency for what it can provide in our life. Status, freedom, traveling, food, the list goes on. No wonder when we think of money, people can fall into the trap of scarcity mindset. Humans operate under hierarchy and social comparison. It’s not always the worst thing to compare ourselves to others; society keeps our actions in check and creates a social contract so we don’t hurt other people. On the flip, it can also indoctrinate us into thinking there’s only room for a few alphas, while the rest of us are the omegas of the pack, of course at varying rankings.

IMHO, the survival-of-the-fittest thinking is overrated as hell; psychologists like Jonathan Haidt have argued that evolution thrived on humans acting on their 10% bee instincts, relying on strong group cohesiveness and collaboration instead of self-interest like our 90% chimp selves 👿 mwahahah hence the name between the buzz, lil bees 🐝 .

So instead of thinking about a concrete number that represents our net worth, let’s think about wealth more holistically, which starts by asking ourselves what are our non-negotiables.

3: Ask yourself how what are your non-negotiables

I said this last week, but there truly is a subjective value to a dollar based on your priorities. We all come from different circumstances and have diverse bars for what encompasses a happy life. One person may be so happy with a job that is a means to an end if they have more time to spend with their aging parents or young children. Another person may choose invest a large portion of their savings to start a company because they believe so wholeheartedly in building something larger than themselves. The stranger next door may want to make money quickly in their 20s to retire early and pursue passion projects for the rest of their lives. We all live under this collective illusion that people seek fame and status, but most of us privately believe in searching for fulfillment in this lifetime. We just want enough money to feel free in our ability to live a life of purpose (bonus if you can splurge on a few select things that make you happy :)). Coming to terms with this can allow you to realize no one’s wealth deters you from attaining your own wealth.

4: Think about how you feel when you have money, and more importantly, when you don’t have money

Although this is changing quite a bit now with companies like Ellevest and Tori Dunlap’s release of the Financial Feminist, conversations surrounding money is still typically a gendered topic, filled with jargon, and stigmatized for most women to talk about. Since the finance industry has been dictated by the cis-white man for so long, it’s not shocking for emotions to be devoid from any conversation involving finances.

Ask yourself, how do I feel when I have money? Now ask yourself the more important question, how do I feel when I don’t have money? I’m a devout believer that your relationship and intuition surrounding money can stem from a combination of your environment and self-belief. The more you deny this, the more you can and will buy into a scarcity mindset, accumulate debt, and never properly manage your money. Understanding your relationship with money and wealth is the actually the first step to having better emotional control for personal financial management and quite frankly, your life.

5: Find things in real-life that are abundant

This might be philosophical for some, but some actions that remind me of the abundance of our reality are:

• Stargaze and think about how our universe is expanding at an accelerating rate

• Sit by the ocean and think about how 95% of the ocean has still not been discovered, given that 71% of Earth is water.

• Sit by yourself in a quiet area, and think about how there are approximately 100 billion neurons in the human brain, almost equivalent to the 100-400 billion stars in the Milky Way Galaxy.

6: Waste a little bit of time and resources

This heading may be a bit controversial in the trying times of climate change, but I think Betty Smith does a beautiful job depicting how the power of no is a practice of abundance mindset, especially when you are raised in a household of scarcity. When Francie’s mom is questioned about Francie wasting her coffee, she responds:

While I’m obviously not encouraging folks to waste food, it’s important to recognize that for people who grew up around scarcity, it’s okay in small doses if this allows you to feel that you, too, deserve a life of abundance.

Once again, buy the fkin latte.

7: Surround yourself with people who think abundantly

The people I hold closest to my heart practice abundance in so many forms. I used to tell these people, you’re going to change the world, and I’m going to be the biggest cheerleader on the sideline. Turns out, being a cheerleader wasn't enough for them. They've convinced me to join the team and that' there’s enough space for everyone. And let me tell you that energy is so contagious.

You spend enough time around these types of people and can’t help but become that yourself. These are people who celebrate your success while celebrating their own, who don’t hesitate to Venmo struggling artists on the streets, who don’t second guess hosting or feeding others. Some even yell at you at restaurants about why you’re meant for so much more on this planet 🤪 

Having people like this in your life brings about difficult conversations but I can personally vouch that this discomfort has transformed me for the better. It allowed me to question my risk tolerance, challenge why I’m not pursuing the ten things I always talk about doing never do, and ultimately think without limits.

what are some ways you practice abundance in your life lil bees? DM me on instagram @betweenthebuzz.

until the next 🐝 & with 💛 ,

Sneha

P.S. I’m reading Give & Take by Adam Grant, which is about why givers individuals who contribute to others' success, ultimately outperform takers and matchers in work and life (relevant!!!). Excited to share my thoughts soon :)